2:48 AM
Yasir Khan
A Heart Touching Love Story.... Must Read... Must SHARE
It had been raining for more than a
week, so much rain it made everyday seemed so restless and gloomy. She
called and said she was coming up. It was the third time she came up to
see me that week. I carried her excuse of why she came all the way here
and went to meet her at the nearby seven-eleven. She was standing there
alone, carrying her red umbrella. Her friend had dropped her off. It was
raining and she was shivering. She looked weak and fragile in the harsh
rain, wearing not enough to keep her warm. She said, "I miss you."
I
told her coldly, "Lets go, I'll take you home." She did not open up her
umbrella, I knew she wanted to share mine. I said, "Open up your
umbrella, let's go." Unwillingly, She opened up her umbrella and walked
with me to the car. She said she hadn't eat lunch or dinner and asked if
we could stop at some place to eat. Right away I answered with a stoned
heart, "No!" Disappointed, she asked me to take her to the train
station, she said she would take the train back home. Maybe it was the
rain, all the trains were full of people with umbrellas and suit cases
who were eager to get home, not caring about who just passed by.
We
waited and waited, she looked at me innocently. Being together for so
long, of course I knew what she meant. I understand how she must feel
when she came all this way here in this kind of weather and I treat her
like this. With her soft eyes staring at me, I felt guilt and wanted to
let her stay for the night. But reality struck again, I said to her
coldly, "Let's go try the other train station."
We were living in
the same apartment building, on the same floor. Back then there were
four of us, and we got along well. We would always eat dinner together,
watch movies, and sometimes go camping. We were more like a family, but I
didn't know I would end up falling in love with the only girl of the
four. Maybe it was during the last year of college, having living
together for two years, we developed deep feelings for each other. After
she graduated she went back home, and I stayed for one more year to
finish school. During that year I was only able to take the train down
to see her on holidays, but never for long.
That was how we kept
the treasured relationship. We were walking along the side of the road.
She was in front of me and I was right behind her. Her umbrella had a
broken spoke. She looked liked a wounded soldier, carrying her rusted
rifle walking weakly. Many times, she was too into thinking or whatever
she was doing, drifting off the road, she almost got hit by the cars
passing by. I wanted to just take her in my arms, but with the love I
had for her and the constant pain in my stomach, I did nothing. On the
way, we passed by the park where we use to always go.
She begged
and said, "Lets go in the park just for a little while please, I promise
I'll go home right after this." With her begging, my cold heart
softened, but I still put up an annoyed face and walked in the park. I
was just sitting on the benches looking like I wanted to leave. She went
to the big oak tree and she was looking for something. I knew she was
looking for what we wrote on that tree with a silver ink pen half a year
ago. If I remember it right, it said, "Chris and Susan was here, Chris
had tea and Susan was drinking hot chocolate. Hope Chris and Susan would
always remember this day, always loving each other, forever." She was
looking around for quite a while, then she came back slowly with tears
on her face. She said, "Chris, I can't find it, it's not there anymore."
I
felt so sour inside, there was a stream of pain, flowing into my heart,
the kind of pain I've never felt before. But all I could do was pretend
I didn't care, and said, "Can we go now?" I opened up my big black
umbrella, she was just standing there, didn't want to leave yet, hoping
there was still a chance. She said, "You made up the story of you and
that other girl didn't you? I know I frustrate you sometimes, but I'll
change, can't we start over?" I didn't say a word, just looked down and
shook my head. After that we just kept on walking towards the train
station, didn't say a word to each other.
Four years ago, the
doctor said I had cancer, but it was found early, so it was still
curable. Thinking that it was okay, I started living my normal life
again, and even forgot about the cancer. I didn't think about the cancer
again and did not go back to the doctor. Until a month ago, my stomach
was hurting for two weeks straight, and the nightmare awakened me again.
First I thought the pain wouldl go away, but it grew stronger until to
the point that I couldn't take it anymore. I went back to the doctor and
took an X-ray. The picture came out and there was a big black spot,
which proved the truth that I did not want to believe. I was at the most
glittering part of my life, but it was coming to an end.
I
wanted myself and the people around me to go through the least pain
possible, so I decided to commit suicide. But I couldn't let people find
out about my intentions, especially Susan, the person I love the most
in this whole world, who still doesn't know about the truth. Susan was
still young, she shouldn't have to go through this. So I made up some
stories and lied to her. It was a cruel thing to do, and it broke her
heart, but it was the fastest way to wipe out three years's feelings. I
didn't have much time, because I would soon start to loose hair and she
would find out eventually. But now I'm close to succeeding, this drama
would soon be over. Thirty minutes more this would all come to an end,
that was what I had in mind.
The train had stopped running so I
called a taxi for her. We were just standing there, waiting, loosing our
last moments in silence. I saw the taxi from far away, I held my tears
and said to her, "Take care of yourself, take good care of yourself."
She didn't talk, just nodded lightly, and then opened up her misshaped
umbrella and stepped out on the street. Out in the rain, we became two
single life forms, one red, one black, so far away from each other. I
opened the door for her and she got in, then I close the gate that would
separate me from her forever.
I
stood by the car, staring in the dark window, at the first love in my
life, also the last one, walking out of my life. The car started,
driving into the street. Finally I couldn't hold my sorrow and the twist
in my heart any longer, waving my arms rapidly chasing after the taxi,
because I knew, this would be the last time I see her. I wanted to tell
her I still love her, I wanted to tell her to stay, I wanted to tell her
so much, but the taxi had already turned in the corner. Warm tears kept
falling down my face, blended with the cold rain drops. I was cold, not
because of the rain. I was cold inside.
She left, and I
didn't get anymore of her phone calls even until today. I know she
didn't see my tears, because they were washed away by the rain. I left
without regrets. But I'm not Chris, I'm that girl Susan, using my
memory, and his diary I found after one year since he left, writing down
these last words...